A Little More About Me

Let's see, where to begin? Seeing as this is about my adventures stepping back into the dating world, some background into my last foray seems appropriate. I was in a long term relationship that as most do, started out wonderfully. He worked hard, and I do mean hard, to "catch" me... and what girl doesn't love that? The passion was intense, sex awesome, and we were great friends, for a while. Enter Hyde, the other side to ex, who was literally the opposite of the man I started with. He was lazy, a liar, outright cruel at times and at the end, a cheat. I did in all honesty love him to the bone, which is the only way I know how to give my heart away... all or nothing. There's just something about a man that makes you feel horrible about yourself that kinda squashes that love like a bug hitting the windshield. Add in the cheating and the car was going 90 miles an hour.
So there I was, out of that relationship and over it for months and finally back to my old self and happy. Still, I hadn't quite decided I was ready to jump back in the dating game. There was, and still is, quite a bit of drama around me, and besides, I was really enjoying that feeling of having that weight lifted off my shoulders, and getting back into old hobbies the old relationship had caused me to let slide. Feeling quite content with things, I had no intention of looking for a relationship, and I still don't know for sure what I'm looking for now. All I know is I stumbled, literally, back on the dating scene.
So here I am, ready to feel it out and see what comes of it. What should make this an interesting ride is the fact that I do tend to make a mess of things sometimes. You should also know if you plan to follow along that when picturing me in your head, you should not picture one of those women who are so hot they have men literally banging down their door. That would not be me. Don't get my wrong, Ugly Betty and I have nothing in common in the looks department, but Im no stunner either. Just an average girl, average sized, with a nympho sex drive that makes single life so much of a pain.
Also, while I tend to make light of things and laugh at myself, I really have a tender heart. Aren't those such a joy when dating? I'm also pretty loyal. I've never cheated in my life, which is a good thing because I wouldnt be any good at it. The only thing that ever came close was when I was casually dating someone, no exclusiveness whatsoever, and I kissed an ex and came pretty close to doing the deed at a party. I felt so guilty ( dont ask me why because as I said, the guy and I werent exclusive) that I drove straight to his apartment and told on myself. No kidding.
Seeing as a tender heart, a hard time with the whole casual ,more than one at a time ,dating that's common nowadays, and the sex drive from hell don't mesh well together, much less with dating in general... this should be an interesting ride. Wish me luck.

- CG