Friend Drama and Moving On

I am getting a little worried about myself. I turned down another night out with friends, on top of the date with Football Fan, to stay in. I love those friends, but going to the same few places to see the same few people gets really old. I am ready for new faces and new places - moving forward, I guess. So what did I do? I soaked in my giant tub forever, spent time trying to read up on the upcoming, and generally relaxing and enjoying every minute, until I got the call that prompted this particular post.
Being pretty late, when the phone rang, I just assumed it was Old Friend calling drunk to say I miss you again. Nope, one of the friends I turned down the night out with was on the phone, sobbing. I mean sobbing. I'm used to these calls, as well, as I am the friend people call when they need something or someone to talk to. I try to be there for all of them, new and old, as much as humanly possible. It hurts me when friends hurt, so I was feeling her pain as I tried to understand what she was saying through the tears. She takes a deep breath and starts over. What happened? She saw the guy who broke up with her well over a year ago, with somebody else. I tried to console her and be supportive, but I must say it was hard for me. Normally I am very nurturing and supportive, but I am also very honest, even though I try to be kind about it. With her I can't do that. She's so emotionally fragile, which I think we've all been at some point, but she is always that way by nature. I think that is alot of her problem in relationships.
Anyway, we talked for a long time, and I think she felt better at the end, mostly she just needed an ear. Now I need an outlet myself, and can't discuss one friends problems with another, so here I am.
Why on earth do women do that to themselves? This man didn't want her, long term, and it was so long ago and she's still giving him the power to hurt her and still angry. The first month after my last relationship I was a little angry, too. It should go away, though. If I saw my ex, with his girlfriend, I would honestly be glad for him things were still going well. I wish she could get to that place to just wish him well. Why she still wants a man that doesn't want her baffles me. She is still so invested in this so far after it's been done. She wants to be friends with him, which normally I'm all for, but not if you have real feelings for somebody. At that point it's just not a good idea. Besides, he's flat out rude to her, so why would you want a friend like that? I've just had to write one off myself, so it's not an easier said than done thing. Relationships, friendships, shouldn't be collected and kept just so you have one. Yeah, we all have casual friends we say hello to, check in on, etc., but if you're going to invest in a relationship of any kind, should it not be healthy and good for both people? Isn't the quality what counts? I think so.
Men are like shoe shopping. If you find a great pair that doesn't fit, don't get mad at the shoes, just find another great pair that does fit. Trying to force a fit only causes pain, and maybe a few blisters. Sure, it's no fun, and we get hurt, but if you spend too long pining away for one great pair, you just might miss the next one. That's what she's doing now.
She takes so long to get over each relationship, then she is so upset because she feels her clock ticking and she worries about her age and if she'll ever find the one. I'm afraid at this pace it will take as long as she fears. I wish I could help her learn to move on more quickly, so she doesn't miss out on the one, or put herself through so much pain. She really is a great person and she deserves much better than she is giving herself credit for. She just doesn't love or respect herself enough. I don't know, maybe I can figure out a way to phrase it to her. She takes things do deeply and personally, and I do not want to do any damage here. She's always been more difficult to be there for because my normally blunt style isn't good with her, which I learned the hard way years ago. I'm gonna think long and hard on this one, and take her to lunch this week and see if I can't get her to see what the rest of us do in herself. Maybe I can find her a good book to help her along.
In the meantime, if there are any women reading this, please just stop this. Just like you can't blame the shoe for not fitting, you can't blame your feet either. That's just the way it goes sometimes.